Oh, who doesn't love a beautiful wedding? The dress, the pageantry, the fairytale details all of it is perfectly delicious, I admit. I raise my hand to say I tuned in this morning to get a glimpse of Kate in that breathtaking gown and to watch Prince William put a ring on it even let Mari and Lila get a peek, too. For sure, for anyone who loves love and appreciates the beauty of it, today is a lovely day. Speaking of which
LISTEN
To Jill Scott's cover of the Bill Wither's classic, Lovely Day. While no one will EVER hold a candle to Withers' deeply soulful stylings in this uplifting tune, Jilly from Philly holds her own on this version, which appears on the 10-day song compilation “Just Before Dawn: Jill ScottFrom the Vault, Vol. 1,” a new release from her former label, Hidden Beach Records. Press play and enjoy!
I'M THINKING ABOUT
Lashanda Armstrong, the young mother of four whom, in the midst of financial, mental, physical and emotional struggles with the deadbeat dad of three of her babies, killed herself and all but one of her kids. Her story, and especially news of her boyfriend's lack of support for her and his kids, made me hold on a little tighter to my babies and really take a moment to thank my husband, Nick, for being a good man. I wrote a story about it. Wanna see it? Here it go! It's running on the MyBrownBaby page on the Parenting Post.
SPEAKING OF
The Parenting Post: Last week, I wrote about how my daughters have permission to hand out knuckle sandwiches to anyone who dares call them the N word a declaration that got plenty of folk in a tizzy. Most of the commenters seemed hell bent on telling me and mine how we should respond to our oppression, all while completely disregarding the actions of the oppressors. After a while, I got tired of trying to explain why standing around LETTING someone assault us with that aggressive, violent word isn't an option in my house. But low and behold, I came across the pitch-perfect post breaking it down so it'll forever be broke: 10 Conversations On Racism I'm Sick Of Having With White People. From now on, instead of explaining and defending how I choose to deal with and teach my children about racism, I'll just link to this. (Well, not every time, but, you get what I'm saying!)
STILL, MY NERVES ARE BAD
Over the handcuffing and involuntary hospitalization of a 7-YEAR-OLD (!) after he had a tantrum over the color of his Easter eggs. Oh, be clear: You read that right. School officials called the police on the child, shackled him and threw him in an ambulance because he got out of pocket over a class project. It apparently was too much for them to actually wait for the child's mother to leave her job and drive 45 minutes to get her baby. By the time she got to the school, her kid, terrified and crying for his mother, was at the hospital, undergoing psychiatric evaluation. The boy suffers from ADHD and is in special ed classes where, one presumes, teachers get paid good tax money to know how to deal with special needs children without police assistance. Heads need to roll over this.
BUT, I APPRECIATE
This white mom's take on her black son's natural hair. In her post, Not Teaching Their Kids How To Be Black In America, Il Panettiere of Workshop For Beginners explains why white parents of adopted black children tend not to comb their children's hair, but then acknowledges that in not keeping it trimmed, these mothers may be sending a message that they don't respect a culture that takes pride in neat hair. Take a look this one is a really thoughtful, introspective read. While I personally love a beautiful, natural hairstyle on little brown boys and girls, I hear what she’s saying here.
AND I LOVE
this post by my blog homie E. Payne of Makes Me Wanna Holler, who, in his blog post, “Really Home Alone,” chronicled the keeping and care of his kids while his wife was away for several weeks. He writes:
No I’m not Mr. Mom, or “babysitting” my own damn kids, or frazzled or hanging on by a thread. Have I been tired? Yes. Have I had moments where I’ve been at wit’s end? Definitely! Have I had any time to myself? After midnight when I can’t leave the house and I’m delirious with fatigue. Have I ever once considered that I can’t do this? Not even once.
I’m DAD, doing what I’m supposed to be doing, doing it thanklessly, doing it because I love my kids, doing it because I was ordained to do so, doing it because I’m not a boy, doing it because it’s my responsibility, doing it because I love doing it, doing it with my eyes closed, doing it in my sleep, waking up and just doing it, doing it and not thinking twice, doing it and doing it well.
Runteldat!
FINALLY, IF YOU'RE A BLACK BREASTFEEDING MAMA
The Brown Mamas Breastfeed Project wants pictures of you breastfeeding your baby for their website, where they plan to promote brown mamas sharing and receiving the beautiful gift of breastfeeding. Anaya of SoulVegMama, who's running the project with Jeanine from It's Better At Home, writes that she firmly believes that planting the seed early and often that breastfeeding is natural and mother's milk is almost always best for the baby magical even can go a long way, and they're starting by upping the numbers of images of brown mamas breastfeeding. What a powerful, beautiful act! Check out The Brown Mamas Breastfeed Project for info on how to join in; they need your pictures by Thursday, May 5th so that they can publish them on their blogs by Mother's Day. I'm pulling out my scanner (I know, I'm dating myself, but I'm a breastfeeding mom from waaaaay back, pre digital cameras and iPhones and such!) to get my picture in. Make a statement by sending in your picture, too!
Denene Millner
Mom. NY Times bestselling author. Pop culture ninja. Unapologetic lover of shoes, bacon and babies. Nice with the verbs. Founder of the top black parenting website, MyBrownBaby.
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Great post! Thanks for all the information!
Thanks so much for mentioning The Brown Mamas Breastfeed Project. Can’t wait to see what you submit.
I just read the white mother’s reflection about grooming her African child’s hair and find myself confused. I don’t dare count the number of time the word “wild” appears, which sounds to me like some kinda dark continent exoticism of curly or kinky hair. Far be it from me to tell another mother how to present their child, but I do take issue with the idea that the only way to celebrate the child’s natural hair is to not do anything with it. I wonder if she feels the same about white children’s hair.