Scary Pumpkins, Grandma Candy & Happy Halloween From The MyBrownBaby Crew!

Just before Halloween every year, Nick, the girls and me make a big deal out of making it over to our local pumpkin pusher, picking out a great big ol’ orange gourd and hauling it back to out kitchen table for a carving. Nick is the carve master—Mari and Lila his willing assistants. I generally take a hands-off approach to the actual work—the smell and pumpkin guts kinda gross me out. But I’m happy to roast the pumpkin seeds (we tried out this Real Simple recipe—delish!) and snap pictures of the finished product when the family pumpkin takes its place out on its throne (i.e., the mailbox).

What you see up top is this year’s creation, which Nick, Mari and Lila dubbed, “The Hannibal Cannibal Pumpkin”—a take on a carving they found in a Google search. Lila happily sacrificed her personal pumpkin for the cause. And tonight, we’ll put a candle in it so that you can really get that awesomely scary Jack O’ Lantern effect.

I hope all the little neighborhood kids enjoy it, because we’re not going to be “The House” this year for the candy. Usually, Trick or Treaters can count on Blow Pops, Snickers bars, Skittles, Almond Joys, Kit Kats and enough Dubble Bubble to keep them stocked in sugar and bubbles through Christmas. But last year, the neighborhood kids showed their patooties when they totally stole our Nightmare Before Christmas Pumpkin right off the mailbox on Halloween night. A moment of silence for Jack the Nightmare Pumpkin…

Soooo, because the neighborhood kids got sticky fingers and can’t help but to steal stuff that doesn’t belong to them, we got a basket full of crappy grandma candy for Halloween this year. Nothing but Red Hots and  Mary Janes, heiffas. Red Hots and Mary Janes. (Except for Maggie and Charlie, who will totally get the good stuff. You know I got a stash.)

Happy Halloween, folks!

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Denene Millner

Mom. NY Times bestselling author. Pop culture ninja. Unapologetic lover of shoes, bacon and babies. Nice with the verbs. Founder of the top black parenting website, MyBrownBaby.


  1. “Red Hots and Mary Janes, heiffas.” Hilarious! Let’s hope Hannibal Cannibal doesn’t come up missing *snicker*. Happy Halloween!

  2. That’s one “BOO-tiful” pumpkin…lol…

  3. You should give them some candy corn and laugh at them as they trek back down the driveway in disgust LOL

  4. Kia Morgan Smith

    You are too funny for words.. For real…

  5. You should give them little knuckle-heads’ high fives!!

  6. Ditto that Angelou! High fives! at my house kids will get one(1) delicious ORGANIC lollipop(translation:$2000.00 bag of candy, we ain’t giving out a buncha cavities this year!)

  7. I love that pumpkin!

  8. Nick and your girls have skills!!! I love the pumpkin. I really enjoy Halloween mainly because the kids are just so happy. Our 5 year old told me she had the best Halloween ever yesterday as she skipped up the sidewalk while trick or treating. She was literally skipping, singing and smiling for almost 2 hours yesterday as we walked from house to house. We ended the night with Hot Cocoa and Sandwiches because they worked up an appetite.

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