By NICK CHILES
Former Cincinnati Bengals cheerleader and high school teacher Sarah Jones, 26, pleaded not guilty Monday after being accused of having sex with a student. Just weeks ago, John Hooker, a 41-year-old high school teacher in Modesto, California, quit his job and left his family so that he could move in with an 18-year-old former student, talking about “she’s the one.” Admittedly it’s been quite a while since I’ve been in high school, but I’m left to wonder: Are they handing out crazy pills with the teaching certificates these days?
In the case of Sarah Jones—whose mother, Cheryl Jones, a middle school principal, was also indicted and charged with tampering with evidence to help her daughter—it’s not hard to imagine what the boys in Dixie Heights High School must have been whispering about her. A sexy NFL cheerleader walking the halls among mere teenage mortals? If those halls could talk, some of their confessions would probably make us blush. When I was in high school, all the boys were transfixed by our third-year Spanish Honors teacher—and, to be honest, she was middle-aged and a bit chubby. I couldn’t even imagine the loonyness an NFL cheerleader could cause among the teenage boy set.
But that kind of begs the question—by now, isn’t she used to male attention? After all, she probably had to beat back NFL linebackers and quarterbacks. Couldn’t she summon enough willpower to brush away the teenage boys like the annoying gnats that most of them probably were? Apparently not. (To be fair, maybe she did brush away all of them—except one.) High school is already a stewing cesspool of teenage hormones—why not throw some 26-year-old teacher hormones into the mix?
And speaking of teacher hormones, what could be passing through the pea brain of John Hooker, to leave his wife and kids and publicly declare that an 18-year-old girl is “the one?” Not to insult the intelligence and commitment of 18-year-old girls, but they are not exactly known for the stability of their infatuations. I give this new “relationship” until halfway through her freshman year of college. That’d be around December 2012. Just enough time for John Hooker to realize he’s thoroughly ruined his life—and in the process also kinda messed up the lives of his three children, one of whom is a junior at the same high school where he met his new lover. Yuck.
With all these cases of teachers like former pro cheerleader Sarah Jones lusting after students, as parents do we now need chaperones to accompany our kids to algebra class? It’s bad enough that we have to worry about all those horny boys and girls sniffing around the halls—now we have to keep an eye on the teachers, too?
1. Los Angeles Teacher Accused Of Lewd Acts—Entire School Staff Replaced
2. Los Angeles Teacher Abuse Has Schools Looking To Teachers For Help In Catching Predators
3. When It Comes to Teen Pregnancy and Sex, CDC Confirms: Teenagers are Morons
4. Boy, Please.
Mom. NY Times bestselling author. Pop culture ninja. Unapologetic lover of shoes, bacon and babies. Nice with the verbs. Founder of the top black parenting website, MyBrownBaby.