Jaden Smith Can Date My Tween But Even Then, He’d Get Some Of This

You remember the drama behind my discovering my daughter’s tween friends like and are actively trying to date boys, right? Uh huh. Well, seeing as it’s a new year and all, I figured I’d just go on ahead and start 2011 off right by laying down the Denene Millner law on dating up in this piece. No need for words. I’m just getting ready. I figure the following tools should be sufficient:

  • A rocking chair for the front porch
  • An NRA card
  • A rifle
  • A shovel
  • And a prime piece of quiet land way out in the woods
  • Seven t-shirts with this list printed in neon letters (you know so Mari can wear one every day of the week)

For the record, Mari is NOT allowed to date. Unless it’s Jaden Smith. Maybe Justin Bieber. Maybe. And if either one of them showed up to our door talking about taking Miss Mari out on a date? Yup, they got this coming courtesy of the hubs, Nick, and our brother-in-law, James. You know, so er’body’s clear and whatnot.

(For those of you viewing this at work, you might want to turn the sound down now this scene, featuring Will Smith and Martin Lawrence acting the straight fool in Bad Boys II, is full of cusses. Much needed cusses.)

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Denene Millner

Mom. NY Times bestselling author. Pop culture ninja. Unapologetic lover of shoes, bacon and babies. Nice with the verbs. Founder of the top black parenting website, MyBrownBaby.


  1. You are so right to lay down the law!! Loved BB2 too. 😉

  2. Priceless!

    I remember my first date (at 17! my dad relented on his 18 rule…it took much begging, sigh). My dad walked by my date (my now husband 11 years later) and said "what do i need to meet him for? he's nobody? he doesn't exist? the only thing i need to know about him is where he goes to school, where his people live and a copy of his license". With that we left….till this day we all joke about it.

    It wasn't until my wedding that my dad retold that story and said "i knew he was a good boy"

    Right on Martin and Will!!! Fear is the truth!

  3. YES!!! Thanks for doing the work on my behalf, because now I will simply
    a) Paste your text into a Word document
    b) Replace Mari's name with Marley's name
    c) Post it in their room, on the fridge and at our front door.
    LOL! Great post (that now has me thinking about the dating scene in a few years for my girls #LeSigh)

  4. LOL cause you ain't playing no games…i hear ya!!! Loved it!

  5. I'm so with you on this one…we must be vigilant!!

    And this is one of my favorite scenes from that movie…"young Thundercat." LOL

  6. MBB Founder and Editor Denene Millner

    @DFig: OMG!!!! LOLOLOLOL!!!!!!! Your Dad was just as bad as mine… one of these days, I'll have to give you the lowdown on what my father said to the first boy I brought to the house. A camera and threats were involved. It. Was. Not. Pretty.

  7. The Adventures of Princess Zaria

    LOL. I loved the part of BB. My husband and I were just talking about this very thing. Zari is 9. I said maybe she could date at 16. He said not even then. He (and now I) feels that dating puts too much pressure on kids. Group outings are fine but one on one dates spell TROUBLE.

    I remember my first house date. My mom sat between us. LOL!

  8. So funny but so right on all levels. I waited to date. Actually I had no choice but that's ok because it worked out great for me. Thank God for strict families. I started dating when I was 18 then married my husband a few years later. He was the only guy I've ever dated and I'm still alive (and thankful). LOL.

  9. Love It. Love It. Love It!!! DFig and Denene, my Dad didn't play either. We couldn't date until we turned 16, and it had to be a group date. But before ANY guy took us out, he had to sit down and watch a football or basketball game with Dad. In the basement. With my two brothers and an uncle or two. Most of the would be suitors never came back to take us out! In fact, Dad even had some of our best friend's would-be dates meet them in that basement as well. Hated it then. Understand it now.

  10. Hmmmm, makes me wonder….

    It seems like the dating age has gotten younger for this generation. But why? Most if not all of us on this post had to wait until late teens to even bring up boys around our parents. What's changed to make preteen/early teen dating more of a norm? Because I think it is the norm. I have volunteered in schools (middle and high) and it seemed like ALL my students with the exception of a few were dating on the weekend(and some even being taken to these dates by their parents).

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